Oh how I wish I could go back to yesterday when my body was pain free and I felt like there wasn't anything I couldn't do. I was Superwoman! I wasn't perfect but at least I gave life all I had to give and felt pride in doing so.
Now here I am, over 50, overweight, & overwhelmed. I just don't know which end is up some days. Thank God for a wonderful man, a loving family, and supportive friends. I feel so blessed but I sure don't feel like I am much of a blessing to them.
I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia over a year ago and had I known what it as and what the indications were I would have known what was going on with me a long time ago. I blamed it on weight gain...because I hurt so much when I much excersise, I have muscles that hurt and spasm and joints that ache and grind against each other. I just sort of gave up on days when I was hurting and took advantage of days when I felt on top of the world. As time went on I got worse and worse and blamed it on stress at work and with the economy. I was already on anti depressants and anti anxiety medications but though it helped my emotional status it didn't do much for the physical one. I was sent to a rhuematologist since I have had Psoriasis since I was diagnosed at 8 years old and the suspected Psoriatic Arthritis (PSA). I received injections in my joints and was started on Methotrexate, which is a chemo drug. It actually started clearing up the outward skin lesions but after a few months of treatment it stopped working. I stopped the treatment gradually because chemo weakens your immune system and I didn't want to destroy mine for no reason.I was told that there was no obvious crippling from PSA at this time. The rhuematologist also told me that the blood tests he took came back negative for Fibromyalgia. The pain continued to get worse as well as tension headaches.Luckily I got in contact with a dear, long, lost friend and found out she was suffering from Fibromyalgia and when I told her what my rhuematologist had to say she told me to find a real doctor. I actually confronted my regular doc & he told me there is no blood test for Fibromyalgia.
I guess I will just have to learn to take each day as it comes and make the best of it. On days when the pain is just to much I will have to forgive myself and just take it easy. If no one at home understands then they will just have to deal with it. I know who I was and I know who I have become and I have to take care of me to the best of my ability because no one can do it for me.
Now here I am, over 50, overweight, & overwhelmed. I just don't know which end is up some days. Thank God for a wonderful man, a loving family, and supportive friends. I feel so blessed but I sure don't feel like I am much of a blessing to them.
I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia over a year ago and had I known what it as and what the indications were I would have known what was going on with me a long time ago. I blamed it on weight gain...because I hurt so much when I much excersise, I have muscles that hurt and spasm and joints that ache and grind against each other. I just sort of gave up on days when I was hurting and took advantage of days when I felt on top of the world. As time went on I got worse and worse and blamed it on stress at work and with the economy. I was already on anti depressants and anti anxiety medications but though it helped my emotional status it didn't do much for the physical one. I was sent to a rhuematologist since I have had Psoriasis since I was diagnosed at 8 years old and the suspected Psoriatic Arthritis (PSA). I received injections in my joints and was started on Methotrexate, which is a chemo drug. It actually started clearing up the outward skin lesions but after a few months of treatment it stopped working. I stopped the treatment gradually because chemo weakens your immune system and I didn't want to destroy mine for no reason.I was told that there was no obvious crippling from PSA at this time. The rhuematologist also told me that the blood tests he took came back negative for Fibromyalgia. The pain continued to get worse as well as tension headaches.Luckily I got in contact with a dear, long, lost friend and found out she was suffering from Fibromyalgia and when I told her what my rhuematologist had to say she told me to find a real doctor. I actually confronted my regular doc & he told me there is no blood test for Fibromyalgia.
I guess I will just have to learn to take each day as it comes and make the best of it. On days when the pain is just to much I will have to forgive myself and just take it easy. If no one at home understands then they will just have to deal with it. I know who I was and I know who I have become and I have to take care of me to the best of my ability because no one can do it for me.
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