2010 A Brand New Year

     Where do I start? I know my intentions were good when I said I was going to take time for myself and write in my blog more but it seems like it just gets harder and harder to find time. No. that really isn't it so much at all. It's just that some days I am in so much pain from Fibromyalgia that I use what time I can to try and do chores around the house and sometimes I am just so exhausted that all I want to do is hibernate. Now that's more like it. Let's be honest here. I have been put on a different medication though and it seems to be helping a little bit anyway. Anything is better than nothing.
     Now, to get to the reason that I am posting today...this is Groundhog Day and more important it is my wonderful dad's birthday. I called him today to tell him Happy Birthday and as as always, it's so good to hear his and my mom's voices. I love them so much and I know they love me and always have. They are both getting older now since I'm getting older but I blame that on my sons turning 32 and 30. It doesn't seem possible when you can still remember those sweet smelling babies they used to be like it was yesterday.
     I found out today, on his birthday, that my dad has prostrate cancer and they just found out. I was heartbroken and cried like a baby when he told me. The thing is, I would have been upset if they hadn't told me and I found out later. When I got off the phone with them I immediately got on the computer to do a little research and found out that everything they told me was correct. I think they must have looked up the same thing I did because it covered exactly what my mom told me. As of right now they still have to meet with his doctor to find out all the pertinent information and I'm sure praying it's the earliest detection possible because his chances of living to a really ripe old age is pretty good.
     Here in lies my dilemma. I have always been close to my parents and I think most kids are and dread even thinking about their parents not always being around. I'm not sure how I'll handle it when something does happen. I know they say grief passes and being a Christian and knowing that my parents are, too, I know where they will be and I will see them again. It's just hard to imagine life without them.
     I always lived near them when I was first married and when I got divorced and met my fiance and moved to Kansas City to be near him I was 46 years old. This is the first time in my life I have ever lived very far from my parents. Maybe that is part of the problem. Since I don't see them as often I miss them more and I can't imagine not seeing them at all.
     I think my purpose in writing this is because I want the world to know how blessed my brother and I are that we have parents that raised us to love each other and not be afraid to show our love. To always stand together as a family and to remember how important family is.
     As our world continues on it's current course of chaos in the coming future, I wish now that more parents had instilled in their children the values and morals that my parents instilled in us about loving for one another and our fellow man and to always remember that God is in charge and He will do whatever He thinks is best for each of His children. Our faith is what gives us peace even in times of sorrow and fear.
     When I first started having so much pain and none of my doctors could find what was wrong I came to the conclusion I could be dying. Not something most people care to think about but something that I accepted and drew strength and peace from. All I did was make even more of a commitment to show people how much I care about them and love them. No, I'm no saint and no angel but I do care about people as a whole. To me, we are all one family. We are torn apart because so many people don't believe that possibility, don't understand each others differences, and are to quick to judge and point fingers. I am not a crusader for anything more than to care for one another and pray for one another to come to a mutual understanding. I know there is evil out there trying to destroy everything we stand for. All I know is I am part of the family of man, I accept you for who you are as long as YOU DO NO HARM. That is where I draw the line. I don't care what color your skin is, what your nationality is, what religion you are, what sex you are, what your sexual orientation is, what your age,  blood type, hair color, eye color is, how you dress or wear your hair or whether you are fat or thin. As long as you do no harm physically or emotionally to another living soul............ I AM ON YOUR SIDE AND I LOVE YOU!

 I AM YOUR FRIEND